I'm gonna make a post so You can't say this blog is deserted.
Remember, I talked about this headache? I stull have this. This is just crazy. I feel like I'm going to throw uo every minute.
I'm so tired of acting like I'm okay. I can't tell my mother, that I have a fever AND this terrbile headache, because she already don't let me go to hip-hop. Think about it, how many days do I have to spend home, AGAIN, when she knows that I'm still sick?
At least I don't miss my classes and I can talk with somebody when I'm at school.
When I'm home, I feel like I'm the loneliest person in the world. I feel like I'm cut off an society.
Actually I feel like nobody cares. I have many 'friends', but that's only me who counts them as a friends. Me, I'm just a stupid girl for them.
And this is the problem. I'm not good enough for anybody. I talk too much. And it's bad because I talk just random things. I'm weird. And not like normally weird, but really weird. I'm not good at communicating.
I don't have confidence.
And I never gonna have if I don't have real friends.
I feel like even those, who I counted as my best friends are now gone.
Even my dad doesn't talk with me.
Another thing that I've mest up.
I don't even care if nobody cares anymore. I'm used to it.
Remember, I talked about this headache? I stull have this. This is just crazy. I feel like I'm going to throw uo every minute.
I'm so tired of acting like I'm okay. I can't tell my mother, that I have a fever AND this terrbile headache, because she already don't let me go to hip-hop. Think about it, how many days do I have to spend home, AGAIN, when she knows that I'm still sick?
At least I don't miss my classes and I can talk with somebody when I'm at school.
When I'm home, I feel like I'm the loneliest person in the world. I feel like I'm cut off an society.
Actually I feel like nobody cares. I have many 'friends', but that's only me who counts them as a friends. Me, I'm just a stupid girl for them.
And this is the problem. I'm not good enough for anybody. I talk too much. And it's bad because I talk just random things. I'm weird. And not like normally weird, but really weird. I'm not good at communicating.
I don't have confidence.
And I never gonna have if I don't have real friends.
I feel like even those, who I counted as my best friends are now gone.
Even my dad doesn't talk with me.
Another thing that I've mest up.
I don't even care if nobody cares anymore. I'm used to it.
Seriously? Are you seriously going down this road again?
ReplyDeleteBecause, believe it or not, I'd cut off my right arm to be as good as you in social situations; I'm not even shitting you on this.
This isn't you talking straight right now; it's the fucking depression and self-deprecating attitude.
Nõuanne: helista arstile. Kurat, psüühika korda saades oled ka füüsiliselt paremas seisus! Võta ometi midagi ette juba!
Talking to myself because I am my own consultant - Lil Wayne.
ReplyDeleteKas sa kuulad ka mida sa suust välja ajad?! Kas sina tahaks et sinu tulevastel lastel niimoodi läheks? Sest mina enda omadel küll nii kaugele ei lase minna! Ma hoolin neist liiga palju, et lasta neil oma elu niimoodi läbi keppida! Sama ka sinuga!
DeleteSU ELU ON LÄBI PÕLEMAS! KURAT PÄÄSTA SEE, MITTE ÄRA TORGI SEDA MINGI PULGAGA KUSKILT EEMALT! VÕTA MIDAGI ETTE KUI SA TAHAD MUUTUST!
And who are we if not your friends? I mean, i know we don't really talk that often, but i can promice to both of you that i think about you on at least 5 days in a week (probably more). And I kinda really miss you and I like what you talk about. I don't think that is weird and if it is, then i am weird too(which i am, but that is not the point). And remember, life is much more fun if you just accept who you are. Who cares what others think, if they find you weird then they obviously just don't understand you, which is their problem, not yours. I am sorry to hear about your headache, it must be very awful. Maybe you should go run some tests, because it might be sth. more dangereuse than just a common cold.
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better soon.
You can call me, I am willing to listen if you have sth. you wanna talk about, and i most certanly won't judge you about your social skills because who will you practice them with, if not with your friends.
I miss you both soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooo ooooooooo much :)
Hope to see ya soon.
Bye!
we have to get together
ReplyDelete